Bumpage Guide for Idiots

A Simple guide to follow:


lankysob said...

I read the Purple route and immediately died with laughter. K. Back to read the whole darn thing, now.

lankysob said...

Brilliant, Apoc. Although, aren't you missing a couple 'Yes' answers in there down the middle and to the right?

Apocalypse said...

Damn! I suck. I am gonna redo it and re-add it back. Thanks for the keen eye.

lankysob said...

So what's a poor artist who was part of Daft Punk with a scratchy, melancholy male voice ever to do on here to be successful...?

Other than that unlikely scenario, it's short, sweet and spot on.

Although, if you were to create longer version of it, I would consider the following:

Instrumental: (does it cover something as epic as Europe - Final Countdown) - this went huge a few months ago. 288 bumps back then was phenomenal.

Comical: (anything that us computer-goers on here can relate to, like Jonathan Coulton - Code Monkey)

Funny Name: (either the band or just one song - I found early on the hard way when I first bumped Fresh Body Shop - Candid, fully-knowing that Fresh Body Shop - Mr. Weirdo would always do better just because the name stood out).

Eye-catching Band Pic: (we all know how this can play out - especially if you've left up the dreaded 61 Road Sign).

Formerly/Still Popular*: (Presidents of the USA, Nada Surf*, Counting Crows, Radiohead, etc. - move to the front of the line on name recognition period.)

Covers: (does yours suck? or does it change the song so much it becomes it's own - a la Obadiah Parker's - Heya, the most popularest song evar!).

* no pun intended. pun actually realized after the fact.

Apocalypse said...

Excellent points! I think we should create a more intricate one for when the actual blog posts on the new site. I actually think it will be funny AND it will be a snarky way of showing the ridiculousness of the bumpage game. Plus, the newbies can benefit from it and earn their mass points.

On a separate note, since I gave up giving a crap about points, I have been having so much more fun than before. I highly recommend it.

willie said...

That's excellent Apoc. Funny and horribly accurate.
On your final note, I always enjoy the site more when I bump for music and not points. But it's hard when you see one early that you know will do well (if Flomid keeps posting I may have a nervous breakdown). Also I get pretty indignant when no one shares my taste in off the wall.

lankysob said...

I agree with your Flomid comment, Willie. I liked his/their songs on the first day and was more than happy to bump them. Then, they kept coming and coming and finally I put my foot down before I punched my monitor.

Apocalypse said...

finally I put my foot down before I punched my monitor

What??? You surf the interweb with your feet off the ground? That must be hell on your knees and back.

@ Willie - I figure, I have all these points... unless Sam and James decide to give a dollar for every point, harboring them is pointless. Fun is fun and since this blog came along (Love you for it, Michele!) it was getting tedious just jockying for points.

As far as Flomid - We need to start commenting on his songs. I wrote on his latest "Hey Flo, got anything original", but then decided against it and canceled the comment! M

lankysob said...

You mean, you don't use your toes on your keyboard? I just put it right there on the ground and type away. You should see what I can do on Guitar Hero with 'em.

ImOnlySleeping said...

You forgot an arrow for the genres experimental, classical & jazz pointing straight to the wasted bumps

Aside 1: If you loved Flomid you'll really love Lalla Rooke. First three posts are all covers.

Aside 2: The two halves of daft punk are sitting at 47 & 89.

Aside 3: I drove myself down to 5k, but that unfortunately was before browse>newest was removed, so nobody noticed. It did feel good when the marconi's radios & talking to the darks of the world made it though.

d said...

That's hilarious.

Alex said...

As someone who is not Vie, Danger, M83, Daft Punk or an ex-member of a major band, I would like to thank all of you from somehow saving me from 'Low Bumpage Obscurity' and allowing me to continue uploading tracks to the61. Maybe one day I will qualify for 'Glorious Bumpage' ;-)
Alex Gloworld

Alex said...
This comment has been removed by the author.